Perfect Pitch: Four Steps for Facing Fear

The process of becoming an effective business communicator is never really complete. It’s a dynamic experience in which new thoughts and feelings are always appearing. Totally unexpected emotions can surface, including what I call a version of stage fright. It can happen even if you’re talking with only one other person!

Stage fright can begin very innocently. You may notice what looks like a bored expression on the face of a client or customer. You may wonder to yourself whether your energy level is where it needs to be. You may see the person stealing a glance and their watch, or checking a cellphone. Worst of all, it can all add up to an impression on your part that they have no interest in you at all, that your ideas are completely wrongheaded, and they can’t wait to get out of there. Your stage fright has turned into catastrophic thinking.

It all begins with a loss of focus. Some minor distraction occurs, and you become less and less able to concentrate. The result can be nervousness, memory lapse, sudden fear, and general discomfort. Fortunately, the whole syndrome can be avoided by keeping a few basic ideas in mind. No matter how new or how experienced you may be, run through this mental check list a few minutes before dealing with an important business communication. A few moments of prevention are worth many hours of cure.

Start by reminding yourself that you have prepared to the best of your ability. You have done your research on your product or service, as well as on your customer or client. You may wonder whether you could have done more, but this isn’t the time for second guessing. Instead, you are going to be instinctive and intuitive. Now you’re going to trust your diligent preparation to do its work for you. No more effort or worry is required. Everything you need is already here.

Next, make yourself a promise to relinquish judgment of your communication during the time it’s going on. Self-judgment during a presentation is self-destruction. It takes you out of the present and into the past or future, and destroys the natural flow of your meeting. So rather than judge yourself, simply observe yourself without any inner commentary, but with full positive motivation. When you are about to make a major point, for example, intend to do it and then know that you are doing it, that you’re translating intention into action.

Third, remind yourself not to let the perceived reaction of your client or customer derail your communication. Don’t let anything you see or hear cause you to second guess yourself. If you have done a sufficient amount of preparation, you may feel that you know how listeners will react to your message. But preparation is not a perfect solution. So keep your poise. Don’t overthink what’s taking place. For the period of time that you’re speaking, have the attitude that you need only to please yourself.

Finally and most importantly, enjoy the communication you’re engaged in. This is the time when you can finally share with your clients what you have worked so hard to achieve. This is an opportunity for satisfaction, not an occasion for being distracted by real or imagined errors. There will be time for that later. Right now, your real thoughts and emotions should take over. Don't allow minor details to obscure what’s really taking place. Let your excitement for the opportunity be completely present – because the only thing you have to fear really is fear itself.