A Kick In The Career: Speak Now Or Be On Hold Forever

I was waiting for the valet when my cell phone died. My wife said it served me right for trying to conduct business at approximately 9:45 in the evening. I countered with the fact that I had kept my phone off during our entire dinner just so we could have quality time together. I had not gotten back to the client who had called. Other people coming out of the restaurant, having curtailed their smoking for a couple of hours, were now reaching with twitching hands for a fresh American Spirit. Me? I need a nice shot of smart phone after the meal.

But, as I said, the phone died and I wasn’t thinking about how to turn this irritating circumstance into an opportunity. I was so focused on venting about the irritating circumstance that no room was left in my psyche for anything but my righteous (always futile) anger at technology. Worse still, I only express myself with the worst imaginable cliché: “If I had a nickel for every time I lost a call…”

The gentleman next to me overheard my lament, and chimed in. “It’s still worth the hassle. I couldn’t live without mine. I waited in line for hours for the new iPhone. I was the oldest guy there.”

The choices we make every second shape the direction of our lives, and I had a choice to make right then. Should I write this stranger off as an intrusive techno-geek who had just supplied me with yet another awkward public moment? Or should I engage with a fellow human being, realizing that we have more in common than it might appear?

Before I reveal the answer (which you have no doubt discovered for yourself already), here’s one caveat: trust your boundary barometer. There will be times when a stranger gives off an irritating or even toxic vibe. You will know who those are, and you will have enough sense to avoid them. Suffice to say this gentleman was not one of those people. In fact, he was just the opposite. He was a sincere, self-assured individual who was comfortable interacting with the world. He was ready to be part of the natural give-and-take. Luckily, I saw that opening.

I engaged him in conversation. I learned he worked in investment banking. We shared a few friendly exchanges, and in the course of the conversation I mentioned that my sister and I were preparing to launch a website devoted to providing tools for children with dyslexia. I wondered aloud if he knew anyone who might be willing to invest in it.

He said he might be, and he wanted to know more. If he felt it was the right fit, the figure he quoted me would allow us to fund the site for an entire two years.

Will this bear fruit? If it doesn’t, maybe my new friend and I will be able to help each other in a different way down the line.  But does the outcome even matter? I allowed myself to connect with a fellow human being, and we struck up a conversation. That in itself is enough to set the wheels of intention into motion.

So the next time someone abruptly (but nicely!) works their way into your conversation, take a moment to appraise the situation. Think about what bringing them into the dialogue might yield.  Stay open, stay ready. Sometimes you are your own best recruiter, and the opportunity could be in a lot of other places besides the other side of a mahogany desk.

Since I have already confessed to using a clichéd expression in this post, here comes another: you never know.